How to Define Yourself as an Artist (Letter to Tatiana Del Toro)

Read Dot’s Exclusive Letter to Season 8 American Idol Contestant Tatiana Del Toro. This letter is meant to empower all artists who are learning how to step into their power. Let’s learn and grow from one-another!

Dear Tatiana,

I know you are probably very confused, discouraged, overwhelmed and saddened by your recent “departure” from American Idol. I want to write this letter to you, because believe it or not, my heart goes out to you. You are in the process of defining who you are as a human being, and when you’re in a show as big as American Idol, you’re not only dealing with your every day personal concerns, but all that energy and pressure from all of the millions of watchers, friends, and family. Everybody is giving you advice, telling you how you should act, think, feel, and what to say. Some are trying to help you, and others hurt you. It can be a very difficult process. This is why it’s so important to know who you are and LOVE who you are.

It appears that over the episodes you have been featured on, you have changed dramatically, from a gitty, flighty, emotional girl, to a mellow dramatic girl, to a girl with a thick accent. Well, maybe all of these are aspects of you, but I’m here to tell you and others, that it is important for YOU to define who you are. People don’t respect someone who appears “lost,” no matter how badly you want something. You have the determination and quite a gift, but somehow, you haven’t found a way to really make that work for you yet, because you got lost in the confusing energy of other people. Now it’s time for you to learn how to “OWN your energy.” You’re not the only one on this Season’s Idol who got lost in trying to DEFINE YOURSELF as an ARTIST. But you were the most interesting one! And I knew they would bring you back because of that. I believe that you have something very good, and once you choose to define what that is, you just may make an even bigger, better mark in the world. The reason why so many people talked about you isn’t because you are a bad person, it is because you remind us all of our own weaknesses. We’re all connected, and you my friend, have made an impact. So be proud of yourself. You got much further than many of the others. And I don’t believe it was because of your laugh. It has more to do with the fact that you can sing, and you were “interesting.”

The things you did right:
1. You always had a song under your belt – great repertoire.
2. You showed great passion and determination.
3. You trained your voice and worked hard to sound great.
4. You took care of your outer appearance and looked great!

The things you still need to learn:
1. How to Connect Authentically to who you really are.
(When you do this, there is no “competition.” It is just an adventure. You feel happy, at ease and accepting of what is. Scotty MacIntyre gets this on some level.)

2. How to define yourself as an Artist. Know what you have to offer.
(When you do this, you choose how you want to feel and own your own energy. You recognize your inner power and you don’t try, you trust.)

3. How to recognize your amazing qualities as a human being!
(When you do this, you always have your own back. There is no despair, striving or failure, just life lessons.)

4. How to be PRESENT.
(When you do this, there is no past – worries, there is no future yearning. There is just what I call, the “Wowness of the Nowness.” That amazing feeling you get when you belt out your favorite song and no one is around, and you feel so alive. You’re not judging yourself. You’re not even trying, you’re just BEING. You showed us glimpses of this in your first stage performance, and it shocked people. Learn how to stay in the moment and go with it.

You do have a gift, my friend. I hope that you continue to sing, and let this American Idol competition empower you. I have a feeling it will. Just spend time alone, with yourself. Sit quietly and just breathe. When thoughts come up, don’t judge them. Just breathe. Over time, you will feel better. Life goes on my friend. Yes, people will talk about you, but remember something; It’s none of your business what other people say about you. It is your business HOW YOU CHOOSE TO SHOW UP IN THE WORLD! Keep on SINGING honey chile and best of luck in your vocal journey.

Sincerely,

Dot Todman
Hollywood Vocal Empowerment Coach
http://www.dotsvoicestudios.com
(To read Dot's advice to all Season 8 American Idol Contestants, Become a Member and Click HERE)

Is It Really Empowering to Be a Critic?

These Kids on American Idol really have a lot of pressure on them to suddenly take singing, which they love to do so much to a whole new level - A GLOBAL ONE. Not only are many of them learning as they go, but they get to be watched, by millions of people at the same time.

After watching tonight's episode, I just had an even deeper feeling of compassion for all of the singers - even the crazy ones like Nick Mitchell, aka, Norman Gentle (who is actually quite a smart fellow).

I know there are a zillion people out there blogging and vlogging about Idol, making judgements on everything from their voice to what kind of pants they were wearing. There's a part of me that just cringes, because I do feel this can be so destructive in building an nurturing the most humanly divine instrument there is. Our voice is connected to our Mind, Heart and Body, and because of this, it's the most vulnerable thing on earth to sing. Keep in mind too, that the way we judge others always reflects back on ourselves. How do you think and feel about your own voice?

I've been working with singers and teaching since the mid 80's, when I was a kid, and I think I have been in just about every position imaginable - from feeling completely humiliated on stage to feeling like an empowered, connected diva. It's taken me a long time to figure out how to build my own voice and even though I was born with a natural talent, I learned that owning my self esteem played a HUGE role in how effectively I sang. The more I learned how to connect to what I liked about myself, and accept where I was at in that moment, the more I was able to grow. My 6 years of Higher Education and 4 Degrees didn't teach me that. Neither did the 20 plus years of teaching. Actually having to endure and overcome pain, trauma and conflict in my own life did. I know if it were not for the people who reached out in compassion that believed in me, I would not be where I am today.

I mention these things because we all suffer and have to endure pain. And we all know it's how we choose to use the "stuff" we go through, that will make or break us. We can use our experiences to have more compassion and love for others.

How does this become music? Take a look at Danny Gokey. He's the perfect example of channeling his experiences into his vocal expression. Danny's wife just passed away 7 months ago and it left him traumatized. Taking the ENERGY of what he felt, connecting his heart to it and using it to move forward in a positive, passionate way inspired many. That takes courage, will power, and confidence. Through it, we heal. Now he says he's on a mission. I'm excited for him because that boy, along with many of the other contestants, can saaaaang!

Have you ever wondered why you are addicted to American Idol? Or why you're not? Interesting thing to think about - isn't it? Some people can't stand the show - I used to never watch it myself because I couldn't stand the criticism... but now I know I have a way to reach out to the contestants, and I'm so glad about this!

We never know what others have endured in life or what brought them to where they are now. Whether we have a "Hollywood Story" or not, we're all humans, and humans grow from love and respect. Beautiful voices come from a passionate, connected heart. So, my message today is - the next time you watch American Idol, or listen to anyone sing, for that matter, try and hear more of where they're coming from. Listen to their energy and find something you like about it. This will help that person to grow if they are receptive. See how it feels to come from a deeper place from within yourself as you listen, and know that they are opening up themselves on some level. Appreciate that - because some day, it just might be you, and wouldn't you want the same?

Dot Todman shares feelings on American Idol - Episode 5 - 1/27/09

I watched Idol tonight and I agree with Randy that it was just "weird." I'm truly hoping that the show gets better, because I know there are so many talented people out there who deserve a shot at getting discovered, but tonight got a little carried away - did it not? I don't blame any of the contestants.

They had some real talent on there this evening, however, they didn't show the best excerpts in my opinion. I mention Sharon Wilbur, Julissa Veloz, Joshua Ulloa, Jasmine Murray, Anne Marie Boskovich, T.K. Hash, and Michael Perrelli. I have constructive notes for every single contestant who has appeared on American Idol this season, on my website. I wish I could say more but until the show gets into the performance segments, I may hold off blogging about it. This season is going to be quite different than the past. There will be younger mentors and each week won't have themes as before, but top of the chart hits. It will be interesting to see what unfolds. Something I liked about the show in the past, was that it brought at least three generations together. The singers for the young kids, the older, more experienced mentors for the parents. My mom had no interest in the show, but when I told her Barry Manilowe was on, she was all over it!

I began directing choirs in 1984 and first taught a voice student in 1989. I went to school and studied and had to overcome my own vocal challenges. I have learned over this time, that singers are more than just the sound and tone you hear coming out of their mouth. It's the most vulnerable of all arts because singing is connected to your soul. I believe in giving constructive advice, building people, and helping them reach their vocal potential and I have seen many so called "rejects" become professional singers.

We now live in a much different world than when I was a child. With the advancement of the world wide web, there way more opportunities out there for singers to find success. American Idol is a wonderful route for some, but to all those who got discouraged, hold your head up high, believe in yourself and don't give up. I say find your true voice, get the right training and keep singing! If you need support, tools and even a reality check, then visit my website: http://www.dostvoicestudios.com. I'm currently taking submission for my "Dot's Idols Around the World" series. You can submit an mp3 and get constructive advice from me about your song. Learn more by clicking here, and have a fabulous Idol Season!

Dot's American Idol History

I've been teaching for several years, but still, every lesson I teach is another learning experience because I believe humanity is evolving, shifting and realizing there is more than just the "outer" layer of who we are. Sure, you can sing a note, you can look great, but what does your spirit feel like?

As a Vocal Empowerment Coach, I'm interested in evolving the whole package. With popular shows like American Idol that have just begun (Jan 13th) their 8th Season, we'll see what Hollywood has to say about that. It would be nice if the standards got a little higher. I used to hate that show and purposely avoided watching it, but in 2007, I was at my Dad's house, and he was watching it on his 12 x 6 foot screen TV, so I had no choice. It was the beginning of a new season. I hated each moment of Simon Cowell's scornful, abusive, destructive words. In order to keep the show entertaining, I felt like they were just exploiting people, making most of them look stupid and ignorant. They'd show the odd talented person, but knowing what I know about the industry (because I work in it and almost every day for me is similar to "Idol Auditions"), more people can actually sing, but think they can't. This show was making it look like the opposite.

Just when I was about to stop watching, something seriously changed. I saw Melinda Doolittle audition and she touched my spirit. Suddenly, I began to care, because I experienced a talent that ignited something in me when I heard her sing. I continued to watch the show because I wanted her to win. That's how I got addicted to American Idol, and now I do believe that indeed, it is one of the most brilliant shows on television. I mean—it has to be if they got me to watch!

Low and behold, during that same season, Idol Chat called me to appear as a Celebrity Vocal Coach, to give advice to the contestants on their show. I was floored and quite happy I had been watching that season. I have to admit the day it aired, I was not feeling very well at all...but one thing I tried to instill was to KNOW YOUR VOICE, which really translates into "know yourself."

That was in 2007. Now, 2 years later here we are again. Another season emerges with a whole new format—not as many auditions this year.... and now I've got a full-blown website, which is reaching out to people who want the whole package. People who know that great sound comes from something much deeper within the human soul. Because, when we sing, we are sending out our energy—bigger vibes of who we are. If our thoughts about ourselves are not positive, everyone can sense it when we sing. Oh how interesting it all is.

This year, My goal is to provide useful, constructive, EMPOWERING information for the contestants on the show, the viewers (fellow singers and future contestants) and the judges! That’s right. Like most people, I agree with the judges sometimes, and other times I don’t. At the end of the day, it’s about respect. If I see anyone get dissed badly this season, you’ll be hearing from me! My standards: give people constructive tools that will help them get better. These are human beings here, and singing is the most vulnerable of all arts. Sometimes I wonder how many people had to go to therapy after auditioning for Idol. Scariest part for the contestants after signing their life away, is that they never really know who or what they’re going to put on the show. Makes sense why it’s the most popular show on television. People want to see themselves, their friends, family...go on a journey! Well, let’s all go together this season. If you have questions—write me. I’ll do my best to answer them. You’ll get more on my website if you’re not here yet.

Not only will I be writing vlogs, but I’ve got free advice on video http://www.dotsidolvlog.com, audio and blogs to come. I’ll be posting a lot up on youtube, but also on my website www.dotsvoicestudios.com.

DOT ON YouTube!
Click Here to view Dot's Idol Vlog from last night's (Jan 13, 2009) American Idol - Season 8 - Episode 1!